Practical Tips For Keeping Vampires Away
News from The Morton Report:

With True Blood back for a fourth season, fans of the hit TV show will know that not every vampire is content with synthetic blood substitute. Some insist on the real deal, freshly decanted from a mortal vessel, and so it’s important to know how to protect yourself.

Fortunately centuries of vampire mythology have described plenty of defences you could use, even if you have run out of garlic.

If you can find any plant seeds such as mustard and poppy then grab them, as well as any grains such as oats and millet, or rice. Traditional folklore seems convinced that vampires are afflicted with a bizarre form of OCD. Just sprinkle the seeds/grains/rice on the ground around your home and the vampire’s obsessive nature will force it to pick up and/or count every item before it can go any further. Some traditions state that a vampire can pick up only one item each year, which should buy you more than enough time to beat a leis…………… continues on The Morton Report
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